Rethinking Education Conference

We went to the Rethinking Education Conference. For the most part, we had fun and learned a lot -- especially about ourselves and where we are going. In the beginning of our trip, Caleb and Zane were both doing things to annoy each other and not listening when the other asked them to stop. Zane kept pestering Caleb in the car (spitting, threatening to bite, etc.). Then Caleb turned out the light in the men's bathroom at Cracker Barrel while Zane was going to the bathroom. After he turned off the light, he returned to the table. I had no idea what was going on until Zane came back to the table fuming and ready to strangle his brother. He had to feel his way out of a strange bathroom in pitch dark. When we got to the conference the first day, the boys wanted to play in Kid Village. I came back an hour or 2 later and found out that Caleb had been knocking down the grocery store that someone had set up. And every time she set it up again, he would knock it down again. She said she asked him to help her put it back and he did help twice. But he kept knocking it down. There was a lot of running around and knocking down box buildings by the boys. But Caleb was really doing things that infringed on other kids play. He wasn't being mean. He was just running around like Godzilla and not listening to anyone. Sometimes when he gets into that zone (happens sometimes, not often) he won't hear what I am saying. So, I removed him from the room to talk to him. But he couldn't listen and started crying and yelling. After a little more time in Kid Village with no change, I decided we needed to leave. I took the boys to my mom's house. Caleb was very calm, played with playdough for hours and volunteered to help with dinner. I talked to him a few times that night and the next morning. I told him he needed to listen to other people that were playing in the room. I asked him not to smash the grocery store and to listen (not run away) when I was talking to him. He promised he would try to do better. So we went back the next day and things went very well. In fact, neither of them wanted to leave when it was time to go. Zane was having so much fun. This is the kid that is always ready to go home after about an hour of being anywhere. We had to leave that day because I promised my mom I would take the boys to my cousin's birthday swim party. We had a great time. And I talked to my aunts about unschooling. They both homeschooled their kids but used curriculum. They were interested and they had their own 2 cents to add. It was good. I had been concerned that they would be against unschooling. But they had each seen unschooling or interest-led learning work in their own kids lives.
Day 3 of the conference, we were there from 10 in the morning to 10 at night and we had the best time. It was what the conference should be. The boys did so much that day -- I'm bummed that I didn't get any pictures. But we were so busy and I got tired of lugging my backpack around with me so I put the camera in the car. Anyway, I would recommend staying in the hotel at the conference. Driving back and forth to my mom's house was tedious and I feel like we missed out on a lot of the comeraderie. Everyone was basically living together for 4 days. I think we could have connected with other people more had we been there more. Plus I missed so many of the sessions that I wanted to see. I missed all of Naomi Aldort's sessions which I am still kicking myself over. But the 3rd day we did lots of kid stuff. Then we went to the talent show. It was the crown jewel of the conference in my opinion. There was a room full of people. There was a sign up sheet full of names of talented people. There was a very funny MC. There were my boys right up front. Caleb kept raising his hand and saying "pick me next." She finally asked him if he had an act. He didn't. So she let him say his name in the Mike. Then all the other kids up front got to say their names in the mike. Zane couldn't stand it anymore he just had to get up there and do something. He said he wanted to tell a story or do some acting. I gave him a pen and told him to write his name on the board. He did. Then he pestered the poor woman until she let him go on. You have to understand that we had not even thought about or discussed the talent show. They had nothing prepared. They have never participated in a talent show and have only been to one several months ago in which they were only remotely interested in watching. So she asked Zane what he was going to do. He said "magic." Then he asked for all the lights to be turned off and the doors shut. People chuckled and somebody lowered the lights. Then he asked everyone to close their eyes. And he ran around checking to see if people really had their eyes closed. But he didn't really have a plan. So then for his next act he said he needed a volunteer. Several people volunteered so he picked 2 girls. Then he told them to run there and back. They ran there and back a couple of times. Then the MC intervened and convinced Zane to bow. So he bowed and let the next person go. I had to take him out of the room because he wanted to get back on the stage and do another act. He cried and cried for 20 min. or so out in the atrium because he had a third act. He said he didn't get to finish his act. I asked him what he was going to do. He said he didn't know. He was very frustrated and angry and sad. He was frustrated because he didn't have any direction or content for his act but he so desparately wanted to. He was angry at everyone for cutting it short. He was sad because he felt helpless. I just held him. Then later he was able to go back in for the end of the show. Afterward, I was happy to see him running and playing with some other kids. He was having a great time.
I'm sad that I missed a lot of the sessions at the conference. But I learned a lot about my boys and myself. And I think they learned a lot about themselves too. I think Zane would like to practice and come up with an act. It is obvious he loves to be in front of a crowd. I'm going to rent some magic show videos. I would also like to take him to see some local plays. I think we'll set up a stage and have some talent shows at home with and without friends over. I think this is a breakthrough for Zane. I am exhilirated to see him so interested. It's not interested, it is like a deep need. It will be interesting to see where this leads.
And that was our experience at RE conference. Next year will be different.